Is this Dumbelievable or is it awesome? I think it’s dumbelievability makes it awesome.

Who wears a kilt and a fedora while playing the bagpipes? (Can you imagine what his core is like? Forget P90x! This is the workout for you.)

And then for him to play the Star Wars theme and make it recognizable while going over curbs and ducking tree limbs on a unicycle? You sir, wherever you are in Portland, are magnificent.

If you see this creative genius, give him a high five…after he finishes playing and steps off the unicycle. He doesn’t need to fall and get impaled on his own bagpipes. That would really be dumbelievable.

So besides the obvious “Oh my God, look at all of those drugs in there!”, how about that cool image?  I want to see what my insides look like but I’m not stuff drugs down my gullet to get the free scan.  And what about the how all of the packets are just floating around?  I thought the stomach was a bit more compact than that.

I’d like to see an overlay to know where the stomach stops and the intestines start.  Wouldn’t it be cool if they found a tumor or bone cancer really early and saved his life?

And before you go out and try this for the free scan it’s actually pretty tough.

More than 70,000 people a day are estimated to pass through San Paolo international airport and approximately five a day are arrested for drug smuggling.

According to my quick calculations, you have a 0.0000714% chance of getting caught.  If I was THAT kind of guy I would easily consider making a bunch of money this way.  They won’t know if you if you don’t do this apparently,

Police said it was his nervous behaviour that tipped off the authorities.

So if you are THAT guy you just found a job in this economy, if you’re dumb. and what to risk the jail time and one of the packets breaking and killilng you, oh, and your story would likely be posted on here.

“Who did you see running from the scene?”

“It was dark but I did see a guy who he had been beaten in the head and was left with lumps.”

A Hells Angels honcho and two other men – one with a Satanic “666″ tattooed on his forehead – were charged with killing a key witness in the biker’s upcoming trial. Via NY Daily News

Is the kid really “stealing” Christmas gifts? And how did the mastermind four year-old get into your house. That sir is why we look doors. Drunk children are out there.

The mother said couldn’t understand how the kid got the “tabbed beer” open. Um, just pull?

I have the exact same question here that I do anytime I find Jerry Springer or Maury Povich on the tube. “Why are these people talking on TV about the idiotic stuff that happens in their life?” Stay anonymous or you’ll end up on the intertubes.

When trying to get out of jury duty, don’t include the following words as this idiot did.  Full link above.

• You Moron
• this crap
• our “justice” system
• goddamn
• rather count wrinkles on my dog’s balls
• thick skulls

The last line is “Leave me the fuck alone.”   That’s probably not going to happen.   This is dumb on a whole new level.

My new favorite book is Born To Run by Christopher McDougall.  There were quite a few bombshells about running and how our bodies work but the biggest one was this nugget from page 173,

When E. C. Fredrick, then the director of Nike Sports Research Lab, arrived at the 1986 meeting of the American Society of Biomechanics, he was packing a bombshell.  ”When subjects were tested with soft versus hard shoes,” he said, “no difference in impact force was found.”  No difference!  ” And curiously,” he added, ” the second, propulsive peak in the vertical ground reaction force was actually higher with soft shoes.”

The puzzling conclusion: the more cushioned the shoe, the less protection it provides.

The book is about the Tarahumara Indians of Mexico who are renowned for their ability to run well beyond the distance of a marathon which they do for fun.  They run 50-75 miles all in sandals of some type while their older runners are often their strongest.

Researchers at the University of Oregon’s Biomechanics/Sports Medicine Laboratory were verifying the same finding. As running shoes got worn down and their cushioning hardened, the Oregon researchers revealed in a 1988 study for the Journal of Orthopaedic & Sports Physical Therapy, runners’ feet stabilized and became less wobbly.

The book goes into explanation and examples how our bodies react better to the hard surface.  As tempting as it is to write the whole chapter in her, it would be a crazy long post.  But throughout the book he makes the point that people running without super cushioned shoes are fairing better including the writer who recovered from his numerous injuries by changing his running style and equipment.

An interesting note that he didn’t connect is the idea that Wilt Chamberlain, who had the highest average minutes per game, fewest games played to reach 15,000, 20,000, 25,000 and 30,000 points, and second all time leader in points, was still able to run a 50 mile ultramarathon at age 60.

Basketball players now only use their shoes once a night and sometimes change at half time. How did we go from shoes that lasted players a whole year to advanced shoes only lasting for one game? If shoe cushioning had such an important role in saving our legs and knees, how did his thin canvas shoes not destroy his knees with all of that pounding?

I remember talking to an Adidas college rep who said it was amazing the amount of force college basketball players put on their shoes.  He told me, and I couldn’t quite understand how, that these guys were essentially destroying the shoes in one game which goes along with the theory that more cushion equals more force.

If you run, want to run, or just like a good story, you should pick up the book.  There is a great story about how we are actually designed to chase down gazelles…and there is proof.

So this is Dumbelievable because Nike has known for a long time that cushioning doesn’t help and even hinders or injures. They have finally seen that others have realized this and they market a basic shoe that I won’t name because they don’t deserve the publicity.  But check out the Vibram Five Fingers, they are the ones to first create this type of shoe as far as I know.  While cool, I bought some cheaper Body Glove shoes that are similar.  I’ll give those a try and see what happens.

This story is also Dumbelievable because it is extremely counter intuitive. Cushioning makes us hit the ground harder?  We can chase an animal until it falls over?  Amazing.

UPDATE: Another barefoot study.  This one from Harvard.

If you don’t know why this is funny then you FAIL as well.

photo via http://www.flickr.com/photos/themadlolscientist

I could have had a clever image of a fox and a gun but I thought you might appreciate this more.

A hunter in Belarus, I have no idea where that is either and I ain’t googling it, wishes he had better aim, a few more IQ points, or just more money after wounding a fox during a hunt.

Bullets must be hella-expensive in Belarus, because instead of shooting the fox to finish up he went all caveman on it…with the butt of his gun. The fox, like any living creature, thrashed around for it’s life and with the guidance of an animal spirit or whatever, clipped the trigger with it’s paw, shooting the dumb and cheap hunter from wherever Belarus is.

The hunter was taken to the hospital by his friends who most likely laughed all of the way to the hospital.

“No, I think it’s YOUR turn to feed the baby.”